The Frog at the Bottom of the Well

The story of The Frog at the Bottom of the Well has been haunting me since the day I met my old friend. She told me that every one of us is the Frog at the Bottom of the Well, and the major difference is that each of us is in a different well. That thought-provoking comparison is significantly alluring to me, and I started thinking about the well in which I am now.

After seeing my friend, I got back home, sat at my working desk, carefully thought about what I was told and what I have experienced in my life up to now, and then seriously wrote down all highlights about me and the person I have been nurturing for nearly 37 years.

The highlights I was listing include

• My family background
• My schools
• My friends, colleagues, and acquaintances
• My current and past titles at work
• My experiences
• My achievements and failures
• My likes and dislikes
• My blacklist

The more items I touched, the more aspects and colors of the well appeared in front of my eyes. Obviously, some hidden corners that I haven’t touched for years were vividly recalled. This process took much more time than I thought and imagined, and it was also the most painful one that I’ve ever had in my life.

In fact, that kind of self-reflection is exactly the biggest obstacle and hardship that a person has to deal with once in his or her life.

As far as my situation was concerned, I finally got 3 essential things I am supposed to conquer in the coming time after having accomplished my self-reflection process.

1. Forgiveness
2. Deafness
3. Management 

Rule 1: FORGIVENESS

“Forgive yourself when things are now out of your power”

Literally, there is a saying – “for every high mountain there is an even higher mountain”; there is no doubt that it is always true. You might be the best one in your game, but when you enter another game, you might be nothing or less powerful and influential. When it happens, what are you supposed to maintain your brilliant and outstanding performance in a new game?

I bet that 99% of readers are going to say that learning is the key to dealing with fresh and new challenges. It is right, isn’t it?

I will not say that you are not right, but honestly, I need to remind you that we are human and humans will suffer from the feeling of Inferiority. For that cause, the very lesson you should learn is to accept your current conditions and forgive yourself.

When I am writing down these lines, I have to acknowledge that I used to feel inferior to others and suffer from malicious envy. Luckily, I finally was able to well control that “evil” and go through the dark night of the mind.

Remember that you were born not to be a Superman; you were born to learn and grow over time. Today, you might not know something, but it doesn’t mean that tomorrow you will be the same. There is a will, there is a way.

Forgive yourself at the moment, keep calm, and learn to make a self-development plan!

Rule 2: DEAFNESS

“Being deaf does not make you dumb. Just as… Being hearing does not make you smart.”

Besides the concept of The Frog at the Bottom of the Well, there are various stories or fables related to Frogs. One of them is “The Fable of The Deaf Frog”.

——————————

A group of frogs were traveling through the forest when suddenly two of them fell into a deep pit. All the other frogs gathered around the pit. When they saw how deep the pit was, they told the two frogs in the hole that, for practical purposes, they were taken for dead. The two frogs ignored the comments of their friends and kept trying to jump out of the pit with all their might. The others continued to insist that their efforts would be futile.

Finally, one of the frogs took heed of what the others were saying and gave up. She collapsed and died. The other frog continued to jump as hard as he could. Once again, the crowd of frogs yelled and beckoned him to stop suffering because, simply, he was about to die; it was in vain to keep fighting. But the frog jumped with increasing force until finally, he managed to get out of the hole. When he came out, the other frogs said to him, “We are glad that you made it out, despite what we screamed.” The frog explained to them that he was deaf, and he thought they were encouraging them to try harder and get out of the hole.

(Source: The Internet)

——————————

What can you learn from the fable? 

The lessons learned here might be

• Ignoring what bad things people are saying about you can protect your eagerness and strong will to achieve your dream and ambition.
• Words are more powerful than we think; and especially, negative words can softly kill one’s attempts and disarm a fierce warrior. In other words, words have the power of life and death.

You might get references from friends, family members, or acquaintances; but you cannot take all of them as evidence for what you are doing since nothing is absolute. Knowing how to turn a deaf ear to all bad thoughts and negativity is such a work of art you are meant to acquire for yourself.

Remember that being deaf does not make you dumb!

Rule 3: MANAGEMENT

“Management means doing things right first and then doing right things.”

Recently, I learned to recognize and prioritize “Doing Things Right” and “Doing Right Things” in every delegated task of mine.

There might be many arguments about these two concepts; however, my intention is not about proving which one is right or more powerful or influential than the other. My purpose is to remind you of two essential elements below:

• Reasoning means opinions and ideas that are based on logical thinking.
• Inspiration means exciting things that make people want to create or do something.

It goes without saying that when you are pursuing something in your life. The first and foremost thing to do is to help yourself strictly follow the right things.

Doing Things Right mean

• Based on Science
• Strictly follow Procedures
• Abide by Rules
• Meet Prerequisites
• or Satisfy Necessary Conditions

You cannot avoid them because they are the base of your argument, the foundation of your development. Without it, everything you are doing becomes unfounded and fundamentally weak.

What about “Right Things”?

Right Things will appear when the first step is accomplished.

Right Things can be interpreted as the combination of Self Image, Ideal Self, and Self Esteem. They are the Sufficient Conditions for  Building a Better Well for You.

Summary Points

• Learn how to forgive yourself when things are not in your power.
• Learn how to ignore bad thoughts and maintain your strong will over time.
• Learn how to do things right first and then do the right things for yourselves.